The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Philistine This ebook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this ebook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this eBook. Title: The Philistine a periodical for peculiar persons (Vol. III, No. 1, June 1896) Author: Various Editor: Elbert Hubbard Release date: October 8, 2023 [eBook #71835] Language: English Original publication: East Aurora: The Society of the Philistines, 1895 Credits: hekula03 and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This book was produced from images made available by the HathiTrust Digital Library.) *** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE PHILISTINE *** The Philistine A Periodical for Peculiar Persons. _Here is something advantageous to life._—THE TEMPEST. [Illustration: Vol. III. No. 1.] Printed Every Little While for The Society of The Philistines and Published by Them Monthly. Subscription, One Dollar Yearly Single Copies, 10 Cents. June, 1896. THE PHILISTINE. CONTENTS FOR JUNE. Extremes, William James Baker. Some Things America Needs, Clavigera. By a man who knows; yet who is willing to forgive the sinners to seventy times seven. The Railer, John Jerome Rooney. The railer forgives no one! he is one of the things America does not need. Shadows, Faith Bigelow Savage. Lines, Stephen Crane. As to Bores, Annie L. Mearkle. Have patience with the bore, you are often one yourself. To My Ladye Love, Ronsard. Written quite a while ago but still timely. Side Talks with the Philistines. A chronicle of opinion conducted by the East Aurora School of Philosophy. _Entered at the Postoffice at East Aurora, New York, for transmission as mail matter of the second class._ _COPYRIGHT, 1896, by B. C. Hubbard._ NOTICE TO Collectors of Artistic Posters. On receipt of 10 cents we will send to any address, a copy of our largely illustrated catalogue of 500 posters exhibited by “The Echo” and “The Century.” “The Echo” is the pioneer in fostering the poster in America. It began its department of Poster-Lore in August, 1895, and has printed it fortnightly, with many illustrations, ever since. Each issue of “The Echo” bears a poster design, in two or more colors, on its cover. During the past year seven of these covers were by Will H. Bradley. “The Echo” is $2.00 a year, 10 cents a number. NEW YORK, 130 Fulton Street. LOOK OUT for the second and popular edition of “Cape of Storms,” price 25 cents. One sent free with every year’s subscription to “The Echo.” _THE LOTUS._ _A Miniature Magazine of Art and Literature Uniquely Printed and Illustrated._ A graceful flower.—_Rochester Herald._ It is a wonder.—_Chicago Times-Herald._ The handsomest of all the bibelots.—_The Echo._ Alone in its scope and piquancy.—_Boston Ideas._ Artistic in style and literary in character.—_Brooklyn Citizen._ The prettiest of the miniature magazines.—_Syracuse Herald._ Each bi-weekly visit brings a charming surprise.—EVERYBODY. THE LOTUS _seeks to be novel, unconventional and entertaining without sacrificing purity and wholesomeness. It seeks to be a medium for the younger writers._ THE LOTUS _is published every two weeks and is supplied to subscribers for One Dollar a year; foreign subscription, $1.25. Sample copy five cents. On sale at all news stands._ THE LOTUS, Kansas City, Mo. The Roycroft Quarterly: Being a Goodly collection of Literary Curiosities obtained from Sources not easily accessible to the average Book-Lover. Offered to the Discerning every three months for 25c. per number or one dollar per year. Contents for May: I. Glints of Wit and Wisdom: Being replies from sundry Great Men who missed a Good Thing. II. Some Historical Documents by W. Irving Way, Phillip Hale and Livy S. Richard. III. As to Stephen Crane. E. H. A preachment by an admiring friend. IV. Seven poems by Stephen Crane. 1—The Chatter of a Death Demon. 2—A Lantern Song. 3—A Slant of Sun on Dull Brown Walls. 4—I have heard the Sunset Song of the Birches 5—What Says the Sea? 6—To the Maiden the Sea was Blue Meadow. 7—Fast Rode the Knight. V. A Great Mistake. Stephen Crane. Recording the venial sin of a mortal under sore temptation. VI. A Prologue. Stephen Crane. THE ROYCROFT PRINTING SHOP, East Aurora, New York. THE PHILISTINE. NO. 1. June, 1896. VOL. 3. EXTREMES. When our day’s competitive course is run, And its gross triumphs, that crude wealth increase, Are trumpeted from ramparts of fat peace— As fine achievements duly wondered on— What of the unfed squalors ’neath the sun? What of the purient crimes night hours release, And woes that from nor day nor night draw ease, That unquenched greed may gold gold heap upon? The rich man, gazing on his winged wealth, Calls church and state to underwrite his claim; The poor protest that law works bane by stealth; Nor rich nor poor know God but as a name. O, far off Christ, thy text to rear and van Shows forth God’s law is—brotherhood of man. WILLIAM JAMES BAKER. SOME THINGS AMERICA NEEDS. What you call a Discerning Person has told me that THE PHILISTINE is read by all the really thoughtful people in America. This surely is not a large class, as I hear you print only twenty thousand copies a month. Now I do not exactly admire your brown paper cover, but I do like your wholesome spirit, and although you have a touch of Yankee flippancy, yet I will help you all I can in clearing the ground, that we may sow a crop worth harvesting. And before I begin my little preachment let me say I like the word Roycroft. “Roy” means king, and “croft” means a home or rest—hence Roycroft means the King’s Rest. But best of all Master Roycroft was really the first man in England to do artistic printing. I am also told that the wives of the rich men in the States are the most ignorant among your women; the reason being that it takes all their time to look after their households; and none of your servants staying in one place longer than three weeks, that your Woman’s Clubs are given up to discussing the servant girl problem. That is, each woman relates her woes to ease her nerves and fight off hysteria till a more convenient season. And this class of care-laden people is largely increasing with you, and yet you continue to sing _Yankee Doodle_ and talk large about twisting the tail of an honest lion. Very well, I pardon you, knowing how childishly ignorant you are, and if I now say some things that I have said before you will pardon me. Observe the two opposite kinds of labor. The first, just mentioned by me, lavishly supported by Capital, and producing Nothing. The second, tramping from place to place, asking for bread, and you giving it a stone pile—and thirty days. Observe further. These two kinds of labor, producing no useful result, are demoralizing. All such labor is. And the first condition of education, the thing General Coxey and all of his cohorts are crying out for, is being put to wholesome and useful work. And it is nearly the last condition of it, too; you need very little more; but, as things go, there will yet be difficulty in getting that. As things have hitherto gone, the difficulty has been to get the reverse of that. During the last eight hundred years, the upper classes of Europe have been one large Picnic Party. Most of them have been religious also; and in sitting down, by companies, upon the green grass, in parks, gardens, and the like, have considered themselves commanded into that position by Divine authority, and fed with bread from Heaven: of which they considered it proper to bestow the fragments in support, and the tithes in tuition, of the poor. But, without even such small cost, they might have taught the poor many beneficial things. In some places they have taught them manners, which is already much. They might have cheaply taught them merriment also—dancing and singing, for instance. The young English ladies who sit nightly to be instructed themselves, at some cost, in melodies illustrative of the consumption of Camille, and the decline of La Traviata, and the damnation of Don Juan, might have taught every girl peasant in England to join in costless choirs of innocent song. Here and there, perhaps, a gentleman might have been found able to teach his peasantry some science and art. Science and fine art don’t pay; but they cost little. Tithes—not of the income of the country, but of the income, say, of its brewers—nay, probably the sum devoted annually by England to provide drugs for the adulteration of its own beer—would have founded choice little museums, and perfect libraries, in every village. And if here and there an English churchman had been found (such as Dean Stanley) willing to explain to peasants the sculpture of his and their own cathedral, and to read its black letter inscriptions for them; and, on warm Sundays, when they were too sleepy to attend to anything more proper—to tell them a story about some of the people who had built it, or lay buried in it—we perhaps might have been quite as religious as we are, and yet need not now have been offering prizes for competition in art schools, nor lecturing with tender sentiment on the inimitableness of the works of Fra Angelico. These things the great Picnic Party might have taught without cost, and with amusement to themselves. One thing, at least, they were bound to teach, whether it amused them or not—how, day by day, the daily bread they expected their village children to pray to God for, might be earned in accordance with the laws of God. This they might have taught, not only without cost, but with gain. Of all attainable liberties, then, be sure the first to strive for is leave to be useful. Independence you had better cease to talk of (you Americans talk too much about it anyway), for you are dependent on every act of what has been dust for a thousand years, so also, does the course of a thousand years to come, depend upon the little perishing strength that is in you. Now what is your American Picnic Party going to do with its leisure? On that your fate as a Nation hangs. Understand this: Virtue does not consist in doing what will be presently paid, or even paid at all, to you, the virtuous person. It may so chance; or may not. It will be paid, some day; but the vital condition of it, as virtue, is that it shall be content in its own deed, and desirous rather that the pay of it, if any, should be for others; just as it is also the vital condition of vice to be content in its own deed, and desirous that the pay thereof, if any, should be to others. You have, it seems, now set your little hearts much on Education. You will have education for all men and women now, and for all boys and girls that are to be. Nothing, indeed, can be more desirable, if only we determine also what kind of education they are to have. It is taken for granted that any education must be good; that the more of it we get, the better; that bad education only means little education; and that the worst thing we have to fear is getting none. Alas, that is not at all so. Getting no education is by no means the worst thing that can happen to us. One of the pleasantest friends I ever had in my life was a Savoyard guide, who could only read with difficulty, and write, scarcely intelligibly, and by great effort. He knew no language but his own—no science, except as much practical agriculture as served him to till his fields. But he was, without exception, one of the happiest persons, and, on the whole, one of the best I have ever known; and after lunch, he would often as we walked up some quiet valley in the afternoon light, give me a little lecture on philosophy; and after I had fatigued and provoked him with less cheerful views of the world than his own, he would fall back to my servant behind me, and console himself with a shrug of the shoulders, and a whispered “The poor child, he doesn’t know how to live.” No, my friends, believe me, it is not the going without education at all that we have most to dread. The real thing to be feared is getting a bad one. There are all sorts—good, and very good; bad, and very bad. The children of rich people often get the worst education that is to be had for money; the children of the poor often get the best for nothing. And you have really these two things now to decide for yourselves before you can take one quite safe practical step in the matter, namely, first: What a good education is; and, secondly, who is likely to give it you. What it is? “Everybody knows that,” I suppose you would most of you answer. “Of course—to be taught to read, and write, and cast accounts; and to learn geography, and geology, and astronomy, and chemistry, and German, and French, and Italian, and Latin, and Greek, and the aboriginal Aryan language.” Well, when you have learned all that, what would you do next? “Next? Why then we should be perfectly happy, and make as much money as ever we liked, and we would turn out our toes before any company.” I am not sure myself, and I don’t think you can be, of any one of these three things. At least, as to making you very happy, I know something, myself, of nearly all these matters—not much, but still quite as much as most men under the ordinary chances of life, with a fair education, are likely to get together—and I assure you the knowledge does not make me happy at all. When I was a boy I used to like seeing the sunrise. I didn’t know then, there were any spots on the sun; now I do, and am always frightened lest any more should come. When I was a boy, I used to care about pretty stones. I got some Bristol diamonds at Bristol and some dog-tooth spar in Derbyshire; my whole collection had cost, perhaps, three half-crowns, and was worth considerably less; and I knew nothing whatever, rightly, about any single stone in it—could not even spell their names; but words cannot tell the joy they used to give me. Now, I have a collection of minerals worth, perhaps, three thousand pounds; and I know more about some of them than most other people. But I am not a whit happier, either for my knowledge, or possessions, for other geologists dispute my theories, to my grievous indignation and discontentment; and I am miserable about all my best specimens, because there are better in the British Museum. And as to your wonderful inventions, why talk at a distance, when you have nothing to say? Or go fast from this place to that, with nothing to do at either? These are powers certainly! Much more, power of increased Production, if you, indeed, had got it, would be something to boast of. Now just cast your Cathode ray this way and observe this fact: A man and a woman, with their children, properly trained, are able easily to cultivate as much ground as will feed them; to build as much wall and roof as will lodge them, and to spin and weave as much cloth as will clothe them. They can all be perfectly happy and healthy in doing this. Supposing that they invent machinery which will build, plough, thresh, cook, and weave, and that they have none of these things any more to do, but may read, or play croquet, or cricket, all day long, I believe myself that they will neither be so good nor so happy as without the machines. But I waive my belief in this matter for the time. I will assume that they become more refined and moral persons, and that idleness is in future to be the mother of all good. But observe, I repeat, the power of your machine is only in enabling them to be idle. It will not enable them to live better than they did before, nor to live in greater numbers. Get your heads quite clear on this matter. Out of so much ground, only so much living is to be got, with or without machinery. You may set a million of steam-ploughs to work on an acre, if you like—out of that acre only a given number of grains of corn will grow, scratch or score it as you will. So that the question is not at all whether, by having more machines, more of you can live. No machine will increase the possibilities of life. It only increases the possibilities of idleness. Suppose, for instance, you could get the oxen on your plough driven by a goblin, who would ask for no pay, not even his beer,—well, your furrow will take no more seeds than if you had held the stilts yourself. But, instead of holding them, you sit, I presume, on a bank beside the field, under an eglantine—watch the goblin at his work, and read poetry. Meantime, your wife in the house has also got a goblin to weave and wash for her; and she is lying on the sofa, revelling in Stephen Crane’s lines. Now, as I said, I don’t believe you would be happier so, but I am willing to believe it; only, since you are already such brave machinists, show me at least one or two places where you are happier. Let me see one small example of approach to this seraphic condition. I can show you examples, millions of them, of happy people made happy by their own industry. Farm after farm I can show you in Bavaria, Switzerland, the Tyrol, and such other places, where men and women are perfectly happy and good, without any iron servants. Show me, therefore, some Kansas or Ohio family happier than these. Or bring me—for I am not inconvincible by any kind of evidence—bring me the testimony of an Illinois family or two to their increased felicity. Or if you cannot do so much as that, can you convince even themselves of it? They are perhaps happy, if only they knew how happy they were. Virgil thought so, long ago, of simple rustics; but at present your steam-propelled rustics are crying out that they are anything else than happy, and that they regard their boasted progress “in the light of a monstrous Sham.” There are three Material things, not only useful, but essential to Life. No one knows how to live till he has got them. These are, Pure Air, Water and Earth. There are three Immaterial things, not only useful, but essential to Life. No one knows how to live till he has got them also. These are, Admiration, Hope and Love. Admiration—the power of discerning and taking delight in what is beautiful in visible Form, and lovely in human Character; and, necessarily, striving to produce what is beautiful in form, and to become what is lovely in character. Hope—the recognition, by true Foresight, of better things to be reached hereafter, whether by ourselves or others; necessarily issuing in the straightforward and undisappointable effort to advance, according to our proper power, the gaining of them. Love, both of family and neighbor, faithful, and satisfied. These are the six chiefly useful things to be got by Political Economy—the great “savoir mourir” is doing with them. The first three, I said, are Pure Air, Water, and Earth. Heaven gives you the main elements of these. You can destroy them at your pleasure, or increase, almost without limit, the available quantities of them. You can vitiate the air by your manner of life, and of death, to any extent. You might easily vitiate it so as to bring such a pestilence on the globe as would end all of you. Some of you Jingo Americans at present want to vitiate it in every direction;—chiefly with corpses, and animal and vegetable ruin in war: changing men, horses, and garden-stuff into noxious gas. But everywhere, and all day long, you are vitiating it with foul chemical exhalations; and the horrible nests, which you call towns, Buffalo, Pittsburg, Chicago and the like (thank God I’ve been in none of them), are little more than laboratories for the distillation into heaven of venomous smokes and smells, mixed with effluvia from decaying animal matter, and infectious miasmata from purulent disease. On the other hand, your power of purifying the air, by dealing properly and swiftly with all substances in corruption; by absolutely forbidding noxious manufactures; and by planting in all soils the trees which cleanse and invigorate earth and atmosphere—is literally infinite. You might make every breath of air you draw, food. Secondly, your power over the rain and rain-waters of the earth is infinite. You can bring rain where you will, by planting wisely and tending carefully—drought, where you will, by ravage of woods and neglect of the soil. You might have the rivers as pure as the crystal of the rock; beautiful in falls, in lakes, in living pools—so full of fish that you might take them out with your hands. Or you may do always as you have done now, turn your rivers into a common sewer, so that you cannot as much as baptize a Yankee baby but with filth, unless you hold its face out in the rain; and even that falls dirty. Then for the third, Earth—meant to be nourishing for you, and blossoming—you have used your scientific hands and scientific brains, inventive of explosive and deathful things, to make it grow cotton and tobacco, and grain for malt and whiskey, giving nothing back to the earth that she may be blossoming and life-giving. Yes, you have turned the Mother-Earth, Demeter, into the Avenger-Earth, Tisiphone—with the voice of your brother’s blood crying out of it, in one wild cry round all its murderous sphere. That is what you have done for the three Material Useful Things. Then for the three Immaterial Useful Things. For admiration, you have learned contempt and conceit. There is no lovely thing ever yet done by man that you care for, or can understand; but you are persuaded you are able to do much finer things yourselves. You gather, and exhibit together, as if equally instructive, what is infinitely bad, with what is infinitely good. You do not know which is which: most Americans instinctively prefer the bad, and do more of it. You instinctively hate the Good, and destroy it. Then, secondly, for Hope. You have not so much spirit of it in you as to begin any plan which will not pay for ten years; nor so much intelligence of it in you (either politicians or workmen) as to be able to form one clear idea of what you would like your country to become. Then, thirdly, for Love. You were ordered by the Founder of your religion to love your neighbor as yourselves. But you have framed an entire Science of Political Economy, founded on rivalry and strife, which is what you have stated to be the constant instinct of man—the desire to overreach his neighbor. And you have driven your women so that they ask no more for Love, nor for fellowship with you; but stand against you, and ask for “justice.” Are there any of you who are tired of all this? Well then try to make some small piece of ground beautiful, peaceful, and fruitful. We will have no untended or unthought-of creatures on it; none wretched, but the sick; none idle, but the dead. We will have no liberty upon it; but instant obedience to known law, and appointed persons; no equality upon it, but recognition of every good that we can find. We will have plenty of flowers and vegetables in our gardens, plenty of corn and grass in our fields. We will have some music and some poetry; the children shall learn to dance it and sing—perhaps some of the old people, in time, may also. We will have some art, moreover pictures and hand-made books; we will at least try if, like the Greeks, we can’t make pottery. The Greeks used to paint pictures of gods on their pots; we, probably, cannot do as much, but we may put some pictures of flowers—butterflies, and frogs, if nothing better. Little by little, some higher art and imagination may manifest themselves among us; and feeble rays of science may dawn for us. Botany, though too dull to dispute the existence of flowers; and history, though too simple to question the nativity of men; nay—even perhaps an uncalculating and uncovetous wisdom, as of rude Magi, presenting, at such nativity, gifts of gold and frankincense. CLAVIGERA. Cumberland, April 6, 1896. THE RAILER. “There is no joy thro’ all the earth: Hope is a witless mocker’s jest: There is no nobler second birth— Nor fair, nor best! “The touch of Death is over all And life is portal to the hell Where men are cattle in a stall To buy and sell! “Yea, he who tears his brother’s heart To cast it to the ravening crowd Is hailed as master of the mart With plaudits loud. “He wears his crown a little space Until a fiercer knave than he Shall push him from his vantage place And monarch be! “The shadows drive away the sun— The flowers are hid by jealous Night, The fruit is plundered—never won— And Might rules Right!” Thus raves the scoffer, age in age, Who bears no message of his own Save the blind clamor of his rage From breast of stone. He holds a balance in his claw To weigh with loaded penny-weights The mighty universe of Law With all its fates! This, to the railer from the tombs Who makes not, neither loves nor gives: Spite of the crackle of thy dooms God lives! God lives! JOHN JEROME ROONEY. SHADOWS. “My wife? She is dead!” said the man. “God help you to bear it,” were the answering words of the woman. “And you would have me do my duty?” “You could do naught else. There are other things than love, my friend; there is honor, and we must abide by that—and the inevitable.” * * * * * “I am the resurrection and the life saith the Lord; he that believeth in me though he were dead yet shall he live: and whosoever believeth in me, shall never die.” * * * * * The last friend had paid his final tribute to the departed. All had gone save the husband, his little daughter, the mother—and a woman simply clad in black. Her face was pale, marked by delicate traceries of mental suffering—a suffering so intense that the whole contour was radiant with martyrdom and the inner spiritual beauty of her woman’s soul. Her eyes, earth brown and blazing with the hidden sunlight of her year’s sad spring, were fixed in mute appeal upon the still, white face within its house of immortality. It was the husband now, who, taking her gently by the hand, lead her to the carriage. Was it “kismet” that, by some grim coincidence, placed these two human, saddened souls in the same carriage—alone! The way was long, and the roads as yet unsoftened by the Spring’s nestling bloom. For a while neither spoke, and then the woman’s voice vibrated through the silence like a breath of air light as the apple blossoms caroling in May, when leaf and bud unite in song to praise their creator. “Dear, you and I are soon to say good bye; by some strange fateful turn of Life’s orbit, we must say it here. You were always generous and loyal to her—you always will be. She has forgiven you, but bids me lead my life alone. The voice of circumstance says to us what we interpret it to say. It is in the needs of a high nature wherein doth lie nobility and honor. We loved; it was so to be, but we did not sin; therein lies the truest and purest love. You”—— The carriage stopped before the open grave, and as the woman watched the damp earth fall—kneeling, she dropped a single passion flower upon the coffin’s lid, and through her mist of tears beheld the cross; then murmuring “In His Name,” she entered the carriage—alone! FAITH BIGELOW SAVAGE. FAST RODE THE KNIGHT WITH SPURS, HOT AND REEKING EVER WAVING AN EAGER SWORD. “TO SAVE MY LADY!” FAST RODE THE KNIGHT AND LEAPED FROM SADDLE TO WAR. MEN OF STEEL FLICKERED AND GLEAMED LIKE RIOT OF SILVER LIGHTS AND THE GOLD OF THE GOOD KNIGHTS BANNER STILL WAVED ON A CASTLE WALL. ... A HORSE BLOWING, STAGGERING, BLOODY THING FORGOTTEN AT FOOT OF CASTLE WALL. A HORSE DEAD AT FOOT OF CASTLE WALL. STEPHEN CRANE. AS TO BORES. A little while ago I read in a paper the following scathing paragraph: There is nothing so terrible as to be fairly well informed on a subject and have some unutterable bore come around and insist on pouring into your ear a mass of ill-digested misinformation on that subject. This looks profoundly, dismally true. It undoubtedly is. No, there is one thing more terrible, and that is to be conscious of being the bore. The boree has been heard from frequently since the Renaissance, and his sentiments have undergone little change. The borer hasn’t had much to say for himself. Yet who can place his hand upon his heart and assert that he has never experienced what it is to be one? To have to be the victim of such, dear sir, is the payment the gods exact for the treasure of extraordinary learning. Nobody has a monopoly of advanced knowledge on this planet, but most of us are born ignorant and remain so until by the grace of heaven we become bores. The state of borehood is the chrysalis stage of the human intelligence, intermediate between grub and butterfly. The apple-borer has such a stage, so has the ordinary unqualified borer of urban life. He has eaten his modicum of the tough, indigestible portion of the tree of knowledge, and must undergo metamorphosis before sipping the nectar of its fruit. The writer of my text may be an exception to this generalization, for clearly he never advanced from ignorance through the purgatory of borehood to celestial learning, or he would know how terrible it is to be an unutterable bore. Alas, poor bore! Will nobody pray for you, or drop a pitying tear? The bore we have always with us. He who would enjoy his superior culture in immunity from the eleemosynary appeals of spiritual mendicants should go into the desert and become a hermit and learn to say like the hermit in Homo Sum, nihil humanum alienum me puto. I do suspect, though, that the saint in question himself fled into the desert to avoid a bore. And that reminds me that a saint of my acquaintance was once called upon to help one of these spiritual apple-borers through the tough integuments of a theological cocoon. He received a visit from the painful creature about every day. How unutterably it must have bored him! But he never said so. At last the poor bore achieved wings and flew away into a Universalist orchard; and as there are few things about which people in general know so much that ain’t so as they do about the subject on which he is now well posted, he probably realizes how terrible it is to be the victim of the morally dyspeptic, misinformed or uninformed, unutterable bore. But the man who has a mission to mankind can’t afford to be bored. Jesus Christ, who was, if anybody ever was, born with fine intuitions, on some subjects, that transcended any laboriously acquired knowledge, must have been the worst bored man in Palestine when his disciples came around and asked him such questions as who should be first in the kingdom of heaven, or the Sadducees propounded that conundrum about the woman with seven husbands. But instead of putting his unutterable boredom on record in a crisp text he answered their irritating questions in that sweetly wise way of his, which must, if anything could, have caused those poor souls to sprout wings. He also said, whatsoever we would that men should do to us, we ought to do to them; and did not except bores. ANNIE L. MEARKLE. TO MY LADYE LOVE. Downe I sat, I sat downe Where Flora had bestowed her graces. Greene it was, It was greene, Far passing other places; For art and nature did combine With sights to witch the gasers eine. There I sat, I sat there, Viewing of this pride of places. Straight I saw, I saw straight The sweetest faire of all faces: Such a face as did containe, Heaven’s shine in every raine? I did looke, Looke did I, And there I saw Apollo’s wyres: Bright they were, They were bright; With them Aurora’s head he tires; But this I wondered, how that now, That shadowed in Cassander’s bow. Still I gazde, I gazde still, Spying Luna’s milke white glasse: Commixt fine, Fine commixt With the morning’s ruddy blase; This white and red their seating seekes, Upon Cassandraes smiling cheeks. RONSARD. SIDE TALKS WITH THE PHILISTINES: BEING SOUL EASEMENT AND WISDOM INCIDENTALLY. The report that Miss Jeannette Gilder has been engaged as Editor of the PHILISTINE is entirely unfounded. No such arrangement has been thought of. * * * * * It’s getting so that ’tis harder to find a gentleman than a genius. * * * * * “What did you do when the contralto flew into a passion and berated you for choosing your own hymns?” asked the Fledgling of the Wise Pastor. “What did I do? why, I did nothing—simply sat there and watched her grow old.” * * * * * Florence Turner fires at me A Deduction and A Query, thus: All animals having the cloven hoof chew a cud. The Devil has the cloven hoof, ergo—he chews a cud. Is it the cud of sweet and bitter fancy? Heaven bless me! how do I know? But still I have no doubt but that he chews—probably “Tin Tag.” * * * * * Verily, in the midst of life we are in debt. * * * * * The loyalty of men to their Alma Mater is ever charming, but the loyalty of a youth to his prospective Mother-in-Law is sublime. In the past two weeks every mail has brought me letters from Harvard men protesting against a certain preachment that appeared in the May PHILISTINE entitled, “By Rule of Three.” For the most part the literary style of these missives corroborates the strictures made as to English as she is writ at Harvard. But the crowning feature of the paper fusilade is a foolscap proposition signed by four sophomores wherein they offer to put the author of “By Rule of Three” under the pump if he will name a day and hour when he dare walk across Harvard Yard. The author, I believe, is not a Baptist, but even if he were, and if the rite referred to should be performed (in lieu of argument), why, Barrett Wendell would still be an Anglomaniac and the facts about English at Harvard would remain unchanged! * * * * * Mr. S. E. Kiser, that good honest Wit, writes me after this wise: At present not more than three out of every possible five persons to be met in this country are possessed of the honest conviction that Nature intended them for dalliance with the Muse. Why does this deplorable state of affairs exist? The answer is not far to seek. We do not give our poets enough encouragement. On the contrary, there seems to be a widespread conspiracy to keep them down. Every time champing Pegasus is mounted by a new aspirant you may see a score of critics flirt their lassoos at him, with the hope of yanking him from his perch; unless, perchance, he be an adept in the Free Masonry that occasionally exempts some favored one from the onslaughts of the iconoclasts. To come to a case in point, _Duncey’s_ endeavors to dispose of a few bards who are presumed to have furnished Uncle Frank’s critic with complimentary volumes of their own make. One of them, a Mr. W. B. Yeats, is taken to task for asserting that “Down by the salley gardens he and his love did meet.” The salley garden is objected to, forsooth, upon the ground that nobody but the inventor knows what it is. Here is a fine proposition! What would some of our most prosperous bards amount to in the estimation of the public if their verses were always couched in terms that anybody could understand? In the very number of the magazine that contains the raillery against Mr. Yeats’ salley garden, Samuel Minturn Peck warbles in this wise: I’m dreaming of the fragrant South, My native pine clad hills afar; I seem to feel upon my mouth The sweetness of a jasmine star! Soon time and space are vanished, And leagues on leagues away, With every grief far banished, My aching heart is hay. This, it is fair to presume, was paid for “at the regular rates” for such matter, and published as an example of praiseworthy song, notwithstanding the fact that mighty few of _Duncey’s_ million subscribers could depose and say whether a jasmine star is sweet or sour, or whether it would be necessary, in order to get the full benefit of its flavor, to peel it and slice it as one would an apple, or suck it like a lemon. It would also be difficult to explain to the satisfaction of a hypercritical person why, “with every grief far banished,” any one could have the faintest shadow of an excuse for possessing an aching heart; or, that point cleared up, how the aching heart aforesaid could still be timothy. But these are trifles that ought not to be permitted to embarrass the sweet singer. I mention them only to illustrate the unfairness with which Mr. Yeats has been treated. Mr. Peck is in vogue, to a certain extent, while Mr. Yeats is not. Ergo: Yeats and his muse must not fool around in the salley garden. This matter disposed of, Sophie M. Almon-Hensley is chided for asseverating that My ship’s in the bay, The glad, blue bay, The wind’s from the west, And the waves have a crest, But my bird’s in the nest, And my ship’s in the bay. “It must,” says _Duncey’s_ astute critic, “be a consolation to the writer of these inspired lines to know that her various possessions are where they belong. After all, there is nothing like having a place for everything and everything in its place.” Which may be witty as well as true, but why ridicule Sophie M. Almon-Hensley on one page and on the next laud Robert Louis Stevenson—God rest his soul—for such verses as these: Through all the pleasant meadow side The grass grew shoulder high, Till the shining scythes went far and wide, And cut it down to dry. These green and sweetly smelling crops They led in wagons home, and so on. No one is likely to suppose for a moment that the scythes went up and down, or that the grass was cut up to soak, or that the green and sweetly smelling crops were led away from home in top buggies. Yet, from an artistic standpoint, Stevenson was justified in acquainting us with the details of the operation, which fact makes the attack upon Sophie M. Almon-Hensley particularly aggravating. The truth seems to be that a large majority of the publishers do not like the idea of breeding up a new race of poets. Those who are already in the field must be tolerated, and those who are well dead may be quoted _ad. lib._ without fear of the copyright law. It is gratifying to note one shining exception to this rule. The editor of the transitory _Chip-Munk_ has evidently determined to publish anything and everything in the shape of verse that falls into his hands. This, if not actually announced, is clearly implied in his Easter number, where, among other things, are to be found these lines: Or there, or here, to toil or pleasure led, The tenants pass, and cut each other dead; Jones, second floor, administers affronts, Because his father was a governor once. After this, the amateur may comfort himself with the assurance that he has at least one friend, with a helping hand outstretched. While young Mr. Bumball’s paper, ink and type hold out, there is no reason why every state, every county, every town and every hamlet may not have a rhymesmith of its very own. This is encouraging, and leads to the hope that in time, if the brood of the mother hen keeps on increasing, it may come to pass that he who runs may rhyme and get his rhyme in print. * * * * * How far can a woman go to win in love’s race? A step backward is often good policy. * * * * * Beg pardon—but who is this Richard Arden Davies that _The London Bookman_ is chewing about? * * * * * That good savage and excellent Wm. T. Hornaday is about to fall into line and start a magazinelet, patterned after the _Chip-Munk_ brood. It will be called _The Dyak_ and the cover will be cut decolette. * * * * * Way & Williams are sending out _A Mountain Woman_. We used to have only two kinds of women, the good and the bad, but now we have many. The book is as good as _The Essays of Elia_, and that is high praise. * * * * * The poor writers we have always with us—if we take the daily paper. * * * * * No one knows the vanity of riches save he who has been rich; therefore I would have every man rich, and I would give every youth a College education that he might know the insignificance of it. * * * * * A Good Philistine is known by his never saying: “As it were.” “So to speak.” “Red letter day.” “Seldom if ever.” “Macedonian cry.” “All along the line.” “Signs of the times.” “Peace to his ashes.” “The blush of shame.” “The deadly upas tree.” “We are pained to learn.” “The devouring element.” “Will not soon be forgotten.” “Our loss is his eternal gain.” “None knew him but to love.” “They are left to mourn his loss.” “The right man in the right place.” “If I may be allowed the expression.” * * * * * To recognize the accidentally impolitic from the essentially wrong is a step always first taken by a Philistine. The Chosen People damn him for his pains, after which they adopt his view and swear on their beards that they always held it. * * * * * Who are the bores? Oh, you make me weary—the others, the others, the others! * * * * * Mr. Wallace, of Chicago, publisher of _Wallace’s Stud-Book_, disputes the statement that the Windy City is losing her literary prestige. * * * * * Clangingharp says the sanest sentiment ever expressed by any of the Vanderbilt family was when the Commodore remarked, “The Public be damned!” * * * * * “Be not righteous overmuch,” said the Preacher. Of course such advice to the average mortal is quite needless—the matter may safely be left in his hands. Still, good things can be overdone: industry for instance. There is a sort of pismire activity that makes for bankruptcy. I once knew a man who used to get up at four o’clock in the morning to hammer and saw (those very early risers always hammer and saw), yet I believe the administrator found hardly enough to pay forty cents on the dollar. The reason was that the man pounded too much early in the morning and not enough in the middle of the day; and the sleek-headed men who sleep o’ nights overmatched his petty busyness and got the trade. * * * * * Nothing is so pleasant as to air our worldly wisdom in epigramatic nuggets. To sit quiet and listen to another do it—well that is another matter! * * * * * It is called _A School for Saints_, and the perpetrator is John Oliver Hobbes. I have sent my name to Mrs. Cragie, entering as a Freshman. Little Journeys SERIES FOR 1896 Little Journeys to the Homes of American Authors. The papers below specified were, with the exception of that contributed by the editor, Mr. Hubbard, originally issued by the late G. P. Putnam, in 1853, in a book entitled _Homes of American Authors_. It is now nearly half a century since this series (which won for itself at the time a very noteworthy prestige) was brought before the public; and the present publishers feel that no apology is needed in presenting to a new generation of American readers papers of such distinctive biographical interest and literary value. No. 1, Emerson, by Geo. W. Curtis. ” 2, Bryant, by Caroline M. Kirkland. ” 3, Prescott, by Geo. S. Hillard. ” 4, Lowell, by Charles F. Briggs. ” 5, Simms, by Wm. Cullen Bryant. ” 6, Walt Whitman, by Elbert Hubbard. ” 7, Hawthorne, by Geo. Wm. Curtis. ” 8, Audubon, by Parke Godwin. ” 9, Irving, by H. T. Tuckerman. ” 10, Longfellow, by Geo. Wm. Curtis. ” 11, Everett, by Geo. S. Hillard. ” 12, Bancroft, by Geo. W. Greene. The above papers will form the series of _Little Journeys_ for the year 1896. They will be issued monthly, beginning January, 1896, in the same general style as the series of 1895, at 50 cents a year, and single copies will be sold for 5 cents, postage paid. G. P. PUTNAM’S SONS, NEW YORK AND LONDON A MOUNTAIN WOMAN. By ELIA W. PEATTIE. With cover design by Mr. Bruce Rogers. 16mo, cloth, gilt top, $1.25. The author of “A Mountain Woman” is an editorial writer on the Omaha _World-Herald_, and is widely known in the Middle West as a writer of a number of tales of Western life that are characterized by much finish and charm. THE LAMP OF GOLD. By FLORENCE L. SNOW, President of the Kansas Academy of Language and Literature. Printed at the De Vinne Press on French hand made paper. With title-page and cover designs by Mr. Edmund H. Garrett. 16mo, cloth, gilt top, $1.25. PURCELL ODE AND OTHER POEMS. By ROBERT BRIDGES. 16mo, cloth, gilt top, $1.25 net. Two hundred copies printed on Van Gelder hand-made paper for sale in America. HAND AND SOUL. By DANTE GABRIEL ROSSETTI. Printed by Mr. William Morris at the Kelmscott Press. This book is printed in the “Golden” type, with a specially designed title-page and border, and in special binding. “Hand and Soul” first appeared in “The Germ,” the short-lived magazine of the Pre-Raphælite Brotherhood. A few copies remain for sale at $3.50. Vellum copies all sold. _For sale by all booksellers, or mailed postpaid by the publishers, on receipt of price._ WAY & WILLIAMS, Monadnock Block. Chicago. [Illustration: MODERN ART Edited by J. M. BOWLES.] Quarterly. Illustrated. “If Europe be the home of Art, America can at least lay claim to the most artistically compiled publication devoted to the subject that we know of. This is _Modern Art_.”—_Galignani Messenger (Paris)._ “The most artistic of American art periodicals. A work of art itself.”—_Chicago Tribune._ _Fifty Cents a Number. Two Dollars a Year. Single Copies (back numbers) 50 Cents in Stamps. Illustrated Sample Page Free._ Arthur W. Dow has designed a new poster for _Modern Art_. It is exquisite in its quiet harmony and purely decorative character, with breadth and simplicity in line and mass, and shows the capacity of pure landscape for decorative purposes.—_The Boston Herald._ _Price, 25 Cents in Stamps, Sent Free to New Subscribers to Modern Art._ L. Prang & Company, Publishers. 286 ROXBURY STREET, BOSTON We make a specialty of Dekel Edge Papers and carry the largest stock and best variety in the country. Fine Hand-made Papers in great variety. Exclusive Western Agents for L. L. Brown Paper Company’s Hand-mades. GEO. H. TAYLOR & CO., 207-209 Monroe Street, Chicago, Ill. _Have you seen the Roycroft Quarterly? The May issue is a “Stephen Crane Number.” 25c. a copy or one dollar a year._ The Roycroft Printing Shop, East Aurora, New York. THE ROYCROFT PRINTING SHOP at this time desires to announce a sister book to the Song of Songs: which is Solomon’s. It is the Journal of Koheleth: being a Reprint of the Book of Ecclesiastes with an Essay by Mr. Elbert Hubbard. The same Romanesque types are used that served so faithfully and well in the Songs, but the initials, colophon and rubricated borders are special designs. After seven hundred and twelve copies are printed the types will be distributed and the title page, colophon and borders destroyed. IN PREPARATION of the text Mr. Hubbard has had the scholarly assistance of his friend, Dr. Frederic W. Sanders, of Columbia University. The worthy pressman has also been helpfully counseled by several Eminent Bibliophiles. _Bound in buckram and antique boards. The seven hundred copies that are printed on Holland hand-made paper are offered at two dollars each, but the twelve copies on Japan Vellum at five dollars are all sold. Every book will be numbered and signed by Mr. Hubbard._ The Roycroft Printing Shop, East Aurora, N. Y. ANÆMIC. Oh pray excuse, this muse. Anæmic she— Nipping, at crackers, Sipping, at tea— A bloodless she! Stuff her ’till she cries, enough! Cuff her, ’twill make her tough. Puff her— —— if you want a duffer Nipping at crackers, sipping at tea— ... A buxom muse is the muse for me. ELEANOR B. CALDWELL. [Illustration] *** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE PHILISTINE *** Updated editions will replace the previous one—the old editions will be renamed. Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG™ concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you charge for an eBook, except by following the terms of the trademark license, including paying royalties for use of the Project Gutenberg trademark. If you do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the trademark license is very easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and research. Project Gutenberg eBooks may be modified and printed and given away—you may do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks not protected by U.S. copyright law. Redistribution is subject to the trademark license, especially commercial redistribution. START: FULL LICENSE THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK To protect the Project Gutenberg™ mission of promoting the free distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work (or any other work associated in any way with the phrase “Project Gutenberg”), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project Gutenberg™ License available with this file or online at www.gutenberg.org/license. Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works 1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg™ electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property (trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works in your possession. If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project Gutenberg™ electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8. 1.B. “Project Gutenberg” is a registered trademark. It may only be used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg™ electronic works even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project Gutenberg™ electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg™ electronic works. See paragraph 1.E below. 1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation (“the Foundation” or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works. Nearly all the individual works in the collection are in the public domain in the United States. If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the United States and you are located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg are removed. Of course, we hope that you will support the Project Gutenberg™ mission of promoting free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg™ works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg™ name associated with the work. You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg™ License when you share it without charge with others. 1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are in a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project Gutenberg™ work. The Foundation makes no representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any country other than the United States. 1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: 1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg™ License must appear prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg™ work (any work on which the phrase “Project Gutenberg” appears, or with which the phrase “Project Gutenberg” is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed, copied or distributed: This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this eBook. 1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg™ electronic work is derived from texts not protected by U.S. copyright law (does not contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees or charges. If you are redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase “Project Gutenberg” associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg™ trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. 1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg™ electronic work is posted with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms will be linked to the Project Gutenberg™ License for all works posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work. 1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg™ License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg™. 1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project Gutenberg™ License. 1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg™ work in a format other than “Plain Vanilla ASCII” or other format used in the official version posted on the official Project Gutenberg™ website (www.gutenberg.org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original “Plain Vanilla ASCII” or other form. Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg™ License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. 1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg™ works unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. 1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing access to or distributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works provided that: • You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from the use of Project Gutenberg™ works calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark, but he has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns. Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in Section 4, “Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation.” • You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg™ License. You must require such a user to return or destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg™ works. • You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of receipt of the work. • You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free distribution of Project Gutenberg™ works. 1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg™ electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the manager of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark. Contact the Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. 1.F. 1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread works not protected by U.S. copyright law in creating the Project Gutenberg™ collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg™ electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain “Defects,” such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by your equipment. 1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the “Right of Replacement or Refund” described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark, and any other party distributing a Project Gutenberg™ electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGE. 1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a refund. If you received the work electronically, the person or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further opportunities to fix the problem. 1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you ‘AS-IS’, WITH NO OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. 1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages. If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by the applicable state law. The invalidity or unenforceability of any provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions. 1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone providing copies of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works in accordance with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production, promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works, harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg™ work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any Project Gutenberg™ work, and (c) any Defect you cause. Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg™ Project Gutenberg™ is synonymous with the free distribution of electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It exists because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from people in all walks of life. Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the assistance they need are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg™’s goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg™ collection will remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure and permanent future for Project Gutenberg™ and future generations. To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4 and the Foundation information page at www.gutenberg.org. Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non-profit 501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal Revenue Service. The Foundation’s EIN or federal tax identification number is 64-6221541. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state’s laws. The Foundation’s business office is located at 809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887. Email contact links and up to date contact information can be found at the Foundation’s website and official page at www.gutenberg.org/contact Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation Project Gutenberg™ depends upon and cannot survive without widespread public support and donations to carry out its mission of increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be freely distributed in machine-readable form accessible by the widest array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations ($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt status with the IRS. The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any particular state visit www.gutenberg.org/donate. While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who approach us with offers to donate. International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. Please check the Project Gutenberg web pages for current donation methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. To donate, please visit: www.gutenberg.org/donate. Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg™ electronic works Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project Gutenberg™ concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared with anyone. For forty years, he produced and distributed Project Gutenberg™ eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support. Project Gutenberg™ eBooks are often created from several printed editions, all of which are confirmed as not protected by copyright in the U.S. unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition. Most people start at our website which has the main PG search facility: www.gutenberg.org. This website includes information about Project Gutenberg™, including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks.